I need more

Despite the post below, I'm actually in a good space with my life. Sure nothing in my life is going as I would like it, but I have adopted a go with the flow attitude. I'm trying hard not to let anything get to me, just enjoy this life that I have. I want to make some changes to my life that will be hard, but I think are necessary because I think I have stalled. I want to feel happy all the time and feel like there is a balance of give and take with those around me, right now I feel content and unfulfilled. Once again, life is pretty good, hell, being realistic, I could be dead or still in the hospital right now, so each day for me is a blessing and I"m not going to complain. However, I want more or something different than what has become the norm. I'm not a big party goer nor do I really enjoy the club scene, alcohol used to help with my enjoyment there but I've decided to give that up. Now that may come as a big surprise to some, but its very true. Don't get me wrong, I can have fun in almost any social situation, but its not what I want.

The plan for this year is simple. Do things out of the ordinary, break out of the box and experience life. I plan on getting out of my comfort zone and travel on public transportation more, this will probably save me money as well as allow me to go visit places I would normally refuse to drive to. 1) I will attend some sporting events. Because the majority of my friends are not sports fan I have gotten away from attending sports events and I miss it. There was a five year period when I would go to a football game and two yankees games a year, and that was on a low year. I can't remember the last professional sporting event I went to. So if this means I need to venture out and make new friends, well I'm going to have to do that. 2) I want to go to more museums and plays. I really don't think I have the money to attend a broadway play with big named stars, but there are more plays out there than just those with the bright lights of the city. I want to sit and watch a painting, let it move me, picture myself in the running colors like I used to do when I was younger. 3) Eat out at better restaurants. No more Fridays, Applebees, Ihop, Ruby Tuesday's etc. as a 1st, 2nd or even a 3rd choice. I want to eat Indian food again, Thai, vegetarian, Ethiopian (had it before and it was great). 4) I will become better with my money. This should be the goal for most of us but I know I fall way short. I get a little depressed and I spend. I spend on food, clothes and others just to make myself feel better. I need to save because I want to move and I want furniture at my new place the same time I arrive not a month or four later. It may be difficult for me to actually follow through with all of these goals, but now I have an idea of what I want. Its going to be hard to do the first 3 and do number 4, but where there's a will there is a way.

I'm going to end this because I'm trying hard to shorten my post. Until next time I leave you with a question: Are you happy or content with your life?